About the Author:
Oleg Fesenko
Odesa, Ukraine
Oleg Fesenko lives in Odesa, Ukraine.
Today I brought the wounded
to the military hospital,
and I couldn’t leave,
even though I hadn’t eaten in three days.
People, of whom there was almost nothing left,
Grabbed me by my hands
with the stumps of their arms,
and asked: How are our brothers at the front?
Surgeons,
with almost nothing left of their hearts,
sat quietly beside me,
while I told cheerful tales of our near victory.
Their hands, tired birds,
practiced making stitches,
faster and faster,
so that one day they wouldn’t be too late
for one stitch.
I carried out bowls of bloody scraps,
spilling remnants of people
into filthy bins,
where there was no room at all
for more pieces
of human bodies.
I mopped the corridor,
picking up bloody filth from all the fronts,
with a T-shirt
punched in four places.
I spoon-fed a bollard man,
who had no arms or legs,
only eyes,
illuminating the chamber
with the light of final clarity.
I carried crates of medicine
behind rushing female volunteers,
who had managed to hug and warm
everyone who happened to be nearby,
showing no one their stiffened tears.
And then I walked out the hospital gates.
To a shabby kiosk.
To eat a sausage.
And I heard a conversation.
They were walking down a street,
A prostitute and a kept woman.
One was saying to the other,
stroking a well-fed lapdog:
“I know for a fact
there’s almost nothing left of Ukraine.
They don’t have light or gas anymore.
They will freeze to death in the winter.
Even now they’re not alive.
I know for a fact.
My daddy’s a deputy.
He controls everything.
Don’t be nervous, stupid…”
And you know what I thought?
I thought about it, and I laughed out loud.
I laughed so hard,
that the lapdog in the kept woman’s arms
flinched
and died.
And the whore shut up,
ran away,
mistaking me for a maniac.
They weren’t wrong, two lost souls.
I thought: I don’t give a fuck!
I don’t care if the whole Ukraine disappears
from the world map.
Ukraine is already forever
on the Great Dream Map,
where, in terrible nightmares,
scary Ukrainians appear
to every orc,
whoever he is,
and tear him apart.
I write in Russian,
because it is the language of losers;
the language of death,
of which there is almost nothing left,
only a few words
for a farewell song
on a grave of the terrible Ukrainian,
who will return in the punishing dreams
of every hungry orc.
I write these non-poems
because I feel very sorry for the doggy
that died from my laughter.
Saying goodbye to the hospital,
I went to the front.
But there was almost nothing left of me.
Only the calm, cheerful anger of the people,
who hadn’t had time to grow up,
yet already refused to live on their knees.
I know for a fact,
all of us will be killed.
It’s just
a normal
historical
practice —
to kill those
who do not want to be slaves
to the victor
But everyone,
who has almost nothing left,
is transported to a fairy tale,
where there is so much human,
that there’s enough
for a couple of new dances.
For people with no arms, no legs.
We dance just with our eyes,
Through which the future sees us,
where there’s so much
work,
love,
songs,
dancing
for the living.
Oleg Fesenko lives in Odesa, Ukraine.
This collection focuses on the war between Russia and Ukraine as seen by Russophone poets from all over the world.
“Monkey’s Defense” is a collection of short stories and parables by Nina Kossman.
This collection includes poems written in 2020-2023. (Russian edition)
“The Lingering Twilight” (“Сумерки”) is Marina Eskin’s fifth book of poems. (Russian edition)